The weight of it all: Mini Yay!

Lost 2.2 pounds this week, woohoo!  I’m pretty pleased with that.  I know that there is definitely room for improvement with the eating and exercise, though.  I went to boxing class once last week but other than that, I seemed to find any and every excuse not to go.  But, I’m planning on going today, assuming the blood sugar is behaving, and again on Thursday.  I really wish I could go to the 6:15 – 7:15 am class but alas, I have to be at work at 8 and there’s no way I could get home and shower and be at work on time.  Even if I changed my hours to where I’d be coming in at 8:30, with commuting, no can do.  The gym keeps talking about adding a 5am class, which I’d be interested in.  I really like having my evenings free, which I think is part of the reason why I’ve been Miss Slacker-Pants on getting to class.

BUT, I know exercise is so important in maintaining good blood sugar control and losing weight so I just need to force myself to do it, even if I’m not in the mood.  Anyone have a spare T-Rex hanging around?

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Friday Fives – July 12.

1.  This week has been fairly “easy” on the dieting front.  I haven’t given it much thought – logged my calories and moved on with my day.  I haven’t been overly hungry or feeling annoyed that I can’t shouldn’t eat XYZ.  I’m feeling confident going into the weekend.  I wish every week could be like this on the weight loss-front!

2.  Sometimes, when I have a day that shows yellow on my CGM graph, I’ll change my high threshold just to see if it’s really that bad.  My current high threshold is 170, so if I change it to 200, voila!  Those pesky yellow lines disappear and I feel like I’m not the world’s worst diabetic.  🙂

3.  I really want to start going to some of these awesome Diabetes conferences!  Definitely a goal for 2014.  Hope everyone’s having fun at the Friends For Life Conference in Orlando!!!

4.  Apple with PB is my new favorite snack.  Yum yum!

5.  I cannot wait to see what my A1c is next month.  However, I worry that if it’s at or below 7.o I’m gonna be all, “Let’s make a baby NOW!” when I know that logically, it’s not quite time yet.

Happy weekend DOC!

Not a week goes by….

… without fighting with my insurance company.

Warning: this post is rather venty and may contain some adult language.  Parental Guidance Suggested.

For the past few months I’ve been in one battle after another with my insurance and/or pharmacy benefits company.  Luckily, everything went smoothly with obtaining my insulin pump and CGM.  However, there have been a few headaches that I’ve had to deal with that are really starting to piss me off.  As if we PWDs don’t have enough to deal with, but insurance makes us jump through hoops (of fire, it seems) to get things done.

Test Strips – My blood sugar meter “talks” to my pump.  Yay, Animas!  It’s a One touch meter, not some fancy unique brand that no one has ever heard of.  Well, my strips cost $95/month.  I’ve reached my out-of-pocket max for this benefits year (a perk to making major cyborg-living purchases!) so since they are classified as Durable Medical Equipment, they should be covered 100% for the rest of my benefit year.  Of course they weren’t so I called and was told they aren’t the preferred brand so if I want them covered 100%, I need to switch meters.  Pisses me off.  My pump supplies (remember, my meter “talks” to my pump) are covered, no questions asked.  So, fine.  I’ll switch meters and only use my meter remote when I will need to bolus from it (wearing a dress).  Worth it to save $$ and not a huge deal since I bolus from my Ping 99.7% of the time anyway.  I call to order my new meter (Verio IQ) and they are back ordered/recalled/they don’t like me so they won’t send me one/something.  So, guess who is on her last pack of strips and has to order more at $95 for a month?  THIS GIRL.  I am tempted to call and argue that they should cover this month’s worth of strips since it’s not exactly my fault that I don’t have my new meter yet.  But, I really doubt I’ll win that fight and frankly, I’m tired and don’t even feel like putting forth the effort.
Insulin – Previously, I used Humalog.  Was always covered with no problems.  Well, my doc switched me to  Apidra.  However, when I first got back on pump therapy, my pharmacy didn’t have any Apidra in stock so I used a vial of Humalog that I had to get started.  Worked fabulously.  But, my Endo wanted me to try Apidra so once the vial of Humalog was empty, I switched to it.  I feel like I’m not reacting to it as well as I did with the Humalog, so I asked to be switched back to see if this is the case.  This is all within the last 6 months.  Endo says, no problem, writes me a script for a 90 day supply of Humalog.  I mail it in to my mail order pharmacy and now my pharmacy benefits people are saying it’s not covered.  Something about the “formulary changed”.  Oh, I can get it, I just have to pay out-of-pocket.  So now I have to use a sub-par (for me) insulin because some higher up in some office decided that they weren’t going to cover my insulin.   Granted, it’s not like my control with Apidra is all over the place (if it was I’d be sure to appeal!), but I wanted to see if I’d do better with Humalog, like I think I would.
Dealing with insurance shit makes me rage.  I don’t expect anything to be free, but I’d at least like reasonable options when it comes to my diabetes management.  $1200/year just to test my blood sugar is outrageous.  Telling me what insulin I can and cannot use??  What the French is up with that?!
I don’t often get diabetes burnout.  Sure I’ll have a day here or there where I’m temper-tantruming against the disease.  But, man.  Insurance company burnout?  I have that 24/7.  I just don’t understand why it has to be so hard to make dealing with diabetes or any other chronic illness just a little bit easier with maybe a few more choices so we can make the best decisions for ourselves to manage this disease that we live with every day.
Maybe some day, this will be me.
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The Weight of it All: Kicking and Boxing.

Well, I did OK-ish on the food front this week, however I don’t have a loss to report.  Honestly, I’ve been struggling, especially on the weekends, for the past month.  Since my nephew passed away, I’ve been turning to food for comfort.  Which is typical of me, I am an emotional eater.  Always have been.  This is a constant struggle.  I see food as comfort, a friend when I’m in need of one, a celebration, entertainment when I’m bored, etc.  I recently ordered Ginger Vieira‘s book “Emotional Eating with Diabetes” and am very much looking forward to diving into it when it arrives.  (Yes, I still read paper books.  Maybe Santa Husband will get me a Kindle this year? *cough*HINT*cough*).  I really hope this book will give me some tools to prevent over treatment of lows and to not abuse myself by abusing food.  I’ll be sure to post a review once I read it.

The husband and I have been doing a pretty poor job of planning our weekend meals, which has led to lots of eating out.  Related to what I said above, I have this mental block where I see eating out as a reward or celebration.  The little devil on my shoulder tells me I’m not going to go to a restaurant and get something boring like grilled chicken and veggies when I can make that at home.  I’m getting stuff I don’t normally cook  – fried goodness, heavy pastas, etc.  I think that the husband and I need to not only be better about including weekend meals in our menu planning, but I also need to remind myself that this is a journey and a process and going out to eat does not give me a free pass to throw calories out the window.

One victory I do have to post about is that I went back to the gym yesterday for the first time in over a month.  I had previously posted about a fear of exercising because my blood sugar seems to behave pretty erratically when I work out.  I’m really striving to keep things as steady as possible with less drastic blood sugar swings.  This was making me hesitant to work out because of the naughty behavior of my blood sugar during and after exercise.  But, after some encouragement from friends, I decided I need to face this head on.  I like boxing and, duh, exercise is good for everyone but especially for a person with diabetes.  So, I went to the gym yesterday and surprisingly, stayed level the whole time.  Started my workout at 169, ended it at 161.  I also was OK after too.  I’m going to continue to play with this and take meticulous notes on my phone of my basal rates, snacks I eat, etc. to see if I can figure out a good game plan for boxing days.  Go team?

My goals for this week are:

  • Go to the gym at least 2 more times.  (And make notes of snacks, BGs, etc. in relation to said workouts)
  • Don’t let the weekend derail me.
  • Make better decisions when dining out.
  • Remind myself that food is fuel and question myself if I am eating due to emotions or boredom.
  • And, not to fart whilst I exercise:

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Giving diabetes the Stink Eye

I’m annoyed with diabetes today.  Usually I try to let the day-to-day annoyances of the managing the D roll off my back and not get me down.  I try to have an attitude of “it is what it is, deal with it and move on”.  I think if I dwelled on how huge a pain in the ass Diabetes really is, I’d probably be pretty miserable to be around.  Pity party of one.  That being said, I am human and of course I have my days where I just want to throw my hands up and scream at the top of my lungs “This crap really, really sucks!”.

It started last night.  The husband and I were going to have some, ahem, fun-adult-married-couple-time together.  Before going to our chamber of love, I glanced at my Dexcom and saw 92 with a single down arrow.  So I downed half a glass of juice to prevent a low.  Of course, this didn’t work.  A little while later at quite an inopportune time, my Dexcom started yelling at me that I was low.  I felt OK so I ignored it.  A few minutes later the low started to hit me so I had to tell the husband we had to hit the pause button so I could test.  53.  Yay.  More juice for me.  We waited and pillow talked and I didn’t feel like I was coming up so after a bit the plug was pulled on our fun adult time.  The mood was pretty much killed then anyway.  Thanks diabetes, for the unexpected and unwanted threesome.  Grrrr.

Of course after this longer than usual low episode, I over-corrected so my Dexcom was yelling at me all night for being high.  So in my half asleep-ness, I bolused and set up a temp basal and, you guessed it, woke up low this morning.  Needless to say, I was especially slow getting moving this monday morning.

I am also having one of those days where the presence of my gizmos and gadgets is annoying me.

So yeah, I’m cranky pants.  I wish we could just take a day off from diabetes.  I know tomorrow will be a better day, but for today, you get the stink eye from me, D.

Not my dog. Kinda wish he was though.  Image from the google.

Not my dog. Kinda wish he was though.
Image from the google.

Friday Fives – July 5

1.  Why do days away from work wreak havoc on my blood sugar even if I eat essentially the same?  I need to figure out a weekend/day off basal profile for my pump.

2.  I get happy when I see people wearing blue on Fridays, even though I’m pretty sure that most of the time it’s just coincidence.

3.  The other day I pricked my finger and had 4 blood spots.  Quads.

4.  It’s a good thing I don’t wear bikinis because the bruises on my belly from my pump site and a correction injection (nice rhyme!) are so not-very-attractive.

5.  I just ordered some SkinTac.  Carlyn, over at One Unit at A Time very kindly gave me a sample wipe to try with my CGM.  This stuff is amazing – I have no adhesive peeling and my sensor is 12 days old!  Thanks for introducing me to this magical stuff, Carlyn!

Let Freedom Ring!

Happy Independence Day, my American friends.  One day I hope those of us living with and loving someone with Diabetes can celebrate our own Independence Day.  Imagine…

  • Freedom from having to test your blood sugar multiple times per day.
  • Freedom from worrying about the carbs in your meal and feeling guilty if you go over your recommended threshold.
  • Freedom from injections or wearing an insulin pump.
  • Freedom from bruises on your belly, arms, butt…
  • Freedom from being nervous to exercise.
  • Freedom to wear a dress without having to figure out where to put your pump.
  • Freedom from the “Can you eat that?”, “My uncle had diabetes and his foot fell off” comments.
  • Freedom from having to go over a company’s medical benefits with a fine tooth comb before accepting an offer.
  • Freedom from having to budget your monthly medical costs.
  • Freedom from 900 million doctors appointments every year.
  • Freedom from having to plan your pregnancy years before you want to actually get pregnant.
  • Freedom from wearing gadgets and robot parts.
  • Freedom from these robot parts beeping and vibrating at the most inopportune times.
  • Freedom from turning down or not initiating intimacy because you feel sick.
  • Freedom from second guessing your decisions regarding your meal choices, insulin dosage, activity level…
  • Freedom from guilt when your blood sugar is higher than you’d like.
  • Freedom from having to lug around all the diabetes crap everywhere you go.
  • Freedom from smelling like band aids.
  • Freedom from wondering if every tummy ache or head ache is related to your blood sugar.
  • Freedom from pump tubing getting caught on doorknobs.
  • Freedom from that “I feel sorry for you” look when someone finds out you have diabetes.
  • Freedom from glucose tablets.
  • Freedom from having to pack half a suitcase of diabetes supplies for a weekend trip.
  • Freedom from middle of the night low blood sugars that leave you feeling the “low hangover” the following day.
  • Freedom from having to take a moment to treat a low.
  • Freedom from your medical alert bracelet getting in your way.

Here’s to our hopeful future freedom!  Happy Independence Day!

The weight of it all: One down, many more to go!

WooHoo!  Lost a pound this week.  I’ll be honest, I didn’t get back on the calorie counting wagon as much as I had hoped this past week.  BUT, even though it took me a few extra days, I am now back on track and hopefully will see another pound (or more) gone this coming week.  It may be a semi-challenging week with the 4th and going to a baseball game on Friday (hot dog and beer anyone?) but I think I’ll be OK.  If I want to indulge, I will just make adjustments elsewhere.

On the recommendations of my CDE, a nurse during my yearly health assessment at work, and fellow blogger Allison :o), I’ve upped my calories to 1550/day.  Seems totally do-able and hopefully I’ll see better results by eating a little more.  We’ll see how it goes.  On the Diabetes Front, I’m aiming to eat less than 60g of carbs per meal to prevent those big after meal spikes.

Exercise is, well…there.  I’m struggling with it for a variety of reasons.  The main one is that my blood sugar seems to react differently to it on different days and I really am working hard to keep my CGM graphs as smooth as possible.  I need to figure out a solution though because I know how important exercise is to not only losing weight, but maintaining a healthy D-Life.  I don’t know if this means choosing a different form of exercise or just being more aggressive with trying new things as far as basal rates when I go to boxing.

My goal for this week is to not let the holiday and baseball game derail me.  And to be more focused on what I am eating over the weekend!

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